I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
