I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize