I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Soap is not a condiment
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
