I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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