Don't you send me to vm
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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