***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
