he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
