the new term for farting is butt boxing.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I just found a bag of teeth...
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
