dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We need to get me chipped asap
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize