you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
my liver is dry heaving
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
