come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
