im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Randomize