I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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