Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Randomize