I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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