dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize