is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
