I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
