Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize