i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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