So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
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