i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize