Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
You were trust falling into bushes
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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