at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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