Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
