69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
