I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Randomize
