wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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