I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize