I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
