I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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