Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
