I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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