so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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