Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize