As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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