It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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