I'm so fucking centered right now
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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