Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
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