I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I supernannyed him into submission
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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