It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
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