We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
