Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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