in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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