So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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