Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
