You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
