I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
meet me or not, i'm out of control
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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