Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Randomize
