i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
