Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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